Hey, my soul-connected creative friend! After five months of weekly episodes I’m back today with the 17th and final episode in the #perfectionistproblems series. *Cue a big awwww*
I want to thank you so much for sharing this series with your friends and followers, for sharing your experiences and struggles, and for coming back each and every single week to this #perfectionistproblems series. Your support, your vulnerability, your encouragement, it has meant the world to me and I feel extremely grateful.
To wrap up the series I choose a topic that sums up all of the perfectionist problems. The greatest tragedy when it comes to perfectionism is that it kills your dreams.
So, let’s talk about that.
PIN THAT, YO!
We’ve all got our dreams. Some of them are lifelong dreams, others have popped up more recently.
Somewhere along the way, you’ve ditched your dreams. Not because you don’t like those dreams anymore, but because they make you feel bad. Dreams are supposed to set your soul on fire. But then your perfectionism shows up and that perfectionism acts like a firehose that drowns your dreams.
If you’ve followed along with the #perfectionistproblems series on this blog, you know by now that perfectionism is fear-based behavior. It’s a thought pattern that goes like this: 'If I do this perfectly or have a perfect life or look perfect, I am in control and therefore people can't hurt me or see me for who I really am.'
When you find yourself thinking 'I need this to be perfect!', it usually means that you're scared that people won't like you, that it won't be good enough, or that you fear failure, disapproval, making mistakes, and/or being criticized.
These perfectionistic thoughts ( 'I need this to be perfect!') are killjoys. They’re not reasonable. These thoughts are the dreamkillers. They come from fear, insecurity, and shame and they result in you feeling bad about yourself.
We all have these thoughts from time to time.
What if it isn’t perfect?
What if I get criticized?
What if people don’t like me anymore?
What if people figure out that I’m not good enough?
What if people figure out that I don’t know what I’m doing or what I’m talking about?
Believing these thoughts does no wonders for your confidence and doesn’t make you feel empowered and ready to take on your dreams. What it does, is make you feel scared and unworthy and like you’re an imposter trying on the big dream shoes but unable to walk in them.
Perfectionism is a killer of dreams.
It keeps you small. It makes you operate from a space of lack, like who you are and what you do isn’t good enough. When comparing yourself to others you never feel like you measure up. Why bother chasing after your dreams when you believe that you don’t have what it takes and you think that other people can do a better (or more perfect) job than you?
Perfectionism also keeps you stuck. Perfection is an illusion, which you’re aware of. But that isn’t a relief to you. It makes you feel paralyzed and unable to move forward. When you know the end result won’t be perfect, why bother working on it at all? Why bother trying something new, something challenging, something you’re dreaming of if you know the end result won’t be perfect?
THIS is what perfectionism does to you and to your dreams. It keeps you small and it keep you stuck. The ONLY way forward is break free from your perfectionism and embrace your perfectly imperfect self instead.
My goal for the #perfectionistproblems series was not to simply list all the ways perfectionism negatively impacts your life and then leave ya hangin’ on which step to take next. #nowayjose
My goal was for you to get a deeper understanding about your perfectionism, to find some recognition and community around the fact that you’re not alone in this perfectionism struggle and that many creatives like you struggle with issues like comparison, procrastination, people pleasing, and dealing with your inner critic. I hope you’ve felt inspired and empowered to take action, to take the first step, or to make the first change towards overcoming your perfectionism and embracing imperfection.
As a soul-connected creative:
You constantly put yourself AND your work out there, which is scary and vulnerable
You believe that to be able to grow as a creative means having to grow as a person
You don’t subscribe to the idea of perfection and realize that by being, showing, and embracing your imperfect self you’re more authentic, interesting, and relatable
I believe that:
Life isn’t meant to be spent searching for perfection
You and your creations matter and that you have a purpose, a message, something that needs to be shared with the world
Through letting go of perfectionism and embracing imperfection your creative and personal potential is unleashed and you feel empowered as a creative
Instead of letting perfectionism keep you small and stuck, I want / hope / encourage / inspire / empower you to chase your dreams and actively CREATE YOUR LIFE. That’s is my mission with The Gratefulist.
To help you break free from your perfectionism and embrace your perfectly imperfect self I’ve created a FREE workbook. It’s a 10+ page, step-by-step guide to help you let go of your perfectionism. Just click the button below and download that workbook (again, fo’ free! :)
If you want to work your way through all of the episodes in the #perfectionistproblems series, I’ve shared a recap of the entire series below.
Maybe you’ve missed a few episodes or it could be that you want to dig deep into that one topic that you’re struggling with. If that’s the case, I hope you’ll take the time to read through all of the actionable blog posts I’ve linked to below.
Quick reminder! Don't forget to download your free perfectionism-busting workbook.
Hi there! I’m Wendy, founder of The Gratefulist and host of the #perfectionistproblems community for recovering perfectionists. I’m insanely passionate about helping you let go of your perfectionism. Let’s chat about the hard stuff - like dealing with comparison, people pleasing, your inner critic & starting a perfectionist detox - so that you can stop caring so much about what other people think and finally take on those dream projects that you've been putting off for so long.